Advice for my Kids

People are funny creatures. We all have certain ways that we behave naturally, it is just the way we are born. Some of those ways are good and some are not. Some of the most important ways that we behave are how we behave towards other people, and how we let them behave towards us.

Other people learn how to treat you by the choices you make. If you behave like a friend, someone who does not repeat the little secrets they share with you to others, someone who tells the truth even when it costs you something, someone who has a kind word when others are hurting then that is how you will teach them how to treat you. If you lie, act mean or let others do those things to you, they will learn that you cannot be trusted or that they can run all over you and you will not stand up for yourself.

You cannot change other people or how they behave, but you have complete control over how you treat them and how you let them treat you. This is important, especially when you first meet someone. If they sense they cannot trust you or you are easy to bully they may choose to treat you the same way or take advantage of you. And, once you have taught them by your actions how you are, it is very difficult to change their mind. First impressions are very hard to change and even harder to change is someone’s opinion of you once they have come to know you, because they are not trying to learn about you anymore, they just act based on what they already know.

Suppose someone has come to not trust you anymore because of how you have acted towards them in the past. It will be very hard to earn their trust again, even if you genuinely change how you choose to act. You have to un-train them how to react to you, and this will take longer and be harder than when they first learned about you.

We all make mistakes. That is why it is important to know how to say “I am sorry” and mean it and work to change your behavior. It is just as important to guard yourself from the abuse of others. Be worthy of the trust of other people, but if someone else proves untrustworthy, do not be surprised in the future when they act that way again. At the same time, be humble enough to know you once acted that way, and be open-minded enough to let someone earn your trust once again.

These are hard lessons, ones you will learn more than once in your lives. Faith in others, humility about yourself and courage to try to do better yourself and to forgive others will carry you through life with honor.
I love you guys.


About cptcaveman

An Army Major, my family and I are in Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. We enjoy photography, cooking, reading and outdoor sports like hunting, fishing and trapping.
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2 Responses to Advice for my Kids

  1. Joann says:

    awesome advice to live life by!!

  2. tallslimstranger says:

    In science there is an equal and opposite reaction. Not so in life, each action, word, deed is perceived through a lens of life experiences and judged in accordance with internal scripts, expectations, fears, hopes and goals. I can only judge for myself and what I see, my reaction can only reflect my values.

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